Monday Morning Preview...

Tut, tut…it looks like rain.  While I don’t dislike the rain and I most certainly welcome it over the snow at this point one thing that’s not working in my favor at the moment is that the rain makes me soo sleeeeeepppppyyyy.  All I want to do is be somewhere where if my eyes happen to close and I happen to drift to sleep for a few brief hours moments it wouldn’t be a problem.  Work is not that somewhere.

I will preface this by saying that this post is more of a preview of what is to come here on DATERVIEW…partially because I’m sleepy and can’t focus and also because I’m fairly busy at work and don’t really have the time to be blogging.  I guess in all fairness this is what I’m paid for…but I should be damn it…someone get on that.

Anyway, this weekend was awesome.  I spent Friday at a charity event at the YMCA for the Strong Kids Campaign.  2 hours of Zumba for $15 which was all donated to the campaign.  I don’t think I’ve ever sweated that much in my life...not very sexy but it was a blast.  I don’t know why more men don’t try zumba…aside from the fact that you burn nearly 1000 calories per workout the class is wall to wall women…it’s a no brainer boys.  Even if you’re worried about looking like a fool the chances are a girl would find you adorable for trying and hence definitely want to go out with you.

Saturday was even better.  Girls night which couldn’t have been more successful.  As a teaser…drunken jenga, make outs, lots of boys, dancing, and sangria to go.  I will write a post on that tomorrow.

Out of Saturday night came inspirations for me to write a few posts.  Some of the topics will include things from how to date (online) and when to kiss to how not to lose yourself in a relationship and dealing with a breakup.  This all stemmed from conversations the girls and I were having during the evening and in the AM… its going to be good.  You know you have a blog addiction when your friends are talking and your giving advice and all your doing is making mental notes of everything so you can write about it later.  The conversations were really inspiring and I’m really looking forward to sharing it with you.    

So in the meantime, try to enjoy your Monday & stay dry!!  I’m going to chug some caffeine and try to wake my sorry ass up…more tomorrow!!!

Its FB Official....

Thats right...as your Thank All That is Holy its Fucking Friday present I'm excited to announce that DATERVIEW now has its own Facebook Page!!!


We all know that if its not on facebook it didn't happen, doesn't exist and well might as well be the devils spawn.  So, now we no longer have to worry about that.  I can keep you updated on whats going on...new posts and special events....I know, I'm excited too.


And speaking of special events...put this on your calendars because you won't want to miss this....my girl Katie from over at Date Me, D.C. and I will be co-sponsoring a Happy Hour here in NYC!!!  Its her birthday weekend and well , I just need an excuse to drink...so you do NOT want to miss this!!!!  Stay tuned for details and while your at it....


....go like DATERVIEW on FB....you'll find the link over on the right! xoxo

Whoa, Its a Website....

I got a call last night from a guy I emailed a couple of times online.  I wasn’t getting very warm and fuzzy feelings from his emails as most of them were only a couple of words to a couple of lines.  I try my best to keep the email exchange with anyone to a minimum so I gave him my number and told him to call. 

I hadn’t heard from him but frankly barely thought about it since he wasn’t someone I was completely dying to meet…but someone who seemed like he could be interesting…maybe.  Well, the other day I get an email from him asking for my number again because he deleted his entire inbox and never wrote it down.  Innocent mistake or is he an idiot?

Last night he texted me to see if he could call.  Ok seriously?  Do guys actually do that?  Why not just call and then you’ll know whether or not I’m available.  I understand it’s a little “safer” to text and get the go-ahead but come on, be an adult.

Anyway, the entire conversation was laced with statements like “ooohhhh shit”…and I swear he sounded like he was stoned.  He probably wasn’t but that’s the best way to describe the way he spoke…I just don’t think he’s very smart.  For instance he asked what I did so I tell him and he says “oh so did you like go to college and shit?”  Yes, I did go to college and shit…you don’t become an engineer by having a cute smile.  And his reply “ooohhhh shit, so you must be like real smart.”  Oh boy, yeah compared to some I suppose I am (I didn’t actually say this but really wish I did).  And this is how the conversation continued.

He then starts telling me that he never knew okcupid was a full blown website.  What?  Yeah, he said he downloaded it on his Droid, which he says he can’t use very well because he’s not very good with technology, and always thought it was just an app on his phone.  I swear to God I wish I was kidding right now.  He told me he used to be an amateur boxer so perhaps he was hit too hard too many times but seriously…are you that fucking stupid??  Anyway, he said he came across it on his friends computer who also uses the site and is so happy because it makes seeing the site so much easier.  Wow, you fucking think so?  I eat veggies with a higher IQ than this guy.

Anyway, he said he really wants to take me out and would love to do some kickboxing training with me at his gym since he is a personal trainer.  That was the best part of the conversation.  A part of me would love to get some free one on one time with a trainer and it would definitely be the most unique first date but then I’m not too sure I can handle having another conversation with this guy.  What do you guys think?? 

First Date Potential???

In Case You Were Curious....

Just because some people asked....this is what I came back to after my date....you can't tell from the angle of these pictures but when I first got there the bumper was nearly coming off but thankfully I was able to more or less push it back in before I drove home....


Thankfully the body shop I go to made my car look absolutely gorgeous and I now have a brand new bumper amongst lots of other parts...

How Cheeky!!!

Well, yesterday was Valentine’s Day…I didn’t want to address it yesterday because frankly I didn’t give a shit and being single somehow it just wasn’t registering on my radar.  Of course I knew it was coming up but I actually almost scheduled a date with someone for Monday not even realizing it was Vday.  If Patches hadn’t said something when I hung up the phone with him I may have ended up on this date feeling completely foolish.  Needless to say the date did not and will not happen for reasons other than the fact that it was Valentine’s Day…let’s just say when we spoke on the phone I could barely make out anything after Hi.  He had the thickest accent, from I can’t remember where, and we were having an extremely difficult time understanding each other.  Plus he was boring.  So case closed.

But now allow me to entertain you with a tale from a date that did actually happen.  He is 30, used to be a Chef and is now in charge of all the food, catering, event planning etc for a major law firm (I believe).  We had hilarious, sweet and sometimes long conversations.  From the phone he seemed like a total catch.  I was so excited to meet him.  We made tentative plans for Thursday since I was extremely sick and had a ski weekend planned that I didn’t want to miss. 

Well Thursday came and while I was feeling better I actually ended up working from home that day because NY got pounded with snow again and I was not about to try and shovel my car out of the driveway and down the block again.  I was in limbo all day about whether or not I would postpone.  By the time I had to get ready the streets had all been plowed, I was all packed and said fuck it since I really wanted to meet him.  I was looking forward to it with one exception…he made dinner reservations.  Now it was restaurant week which I love love love…but this was a first date.  For those who have been around a while you know my feelings on this.  For those who haven’t let me explain…I hate doing dinner on first dates.  I feel a first date should be short-ish, sweet and nothing crazy.  And yes, dinner is crazy.  Some people don’t mind but personally I’d rather not ask ‘get to know you’ questions while trying to navigate my way around my entrée.   That coupled with the fact that I hate eating in front of people I don’t know is part of why I tend to veer away from dinner on first dates.

Anyway, I decided it was too cold, too snowy and I was far too lazy to take public transportation into the city…that coupled with the fact that word was the schedules were all fucked up anyway so I didn’t want to deal with that if I didn’t have to.  Driving it was.  On my way in I was excited to meet Chef and simultaneously stressed I’d never be able to find parking amongst the mounds of snow (I love the way my brain works).  Luckily I had no issues parking and found a perfectly plowed and legal spot (which I didn’t even have to pay for – this is HUGE) right across from the restaurant.  We had planned to meet earlier then our reservation because Chef was going to show me around Eataly.  I had never been but its all the rage right now and being able to get shown around by someone from the culinary world was amazing.  I was in a food paradise.  For my NY readers…if you have the opportunity definitely go check it out.  There are so many options to sit and eat as well as shop.  It almost reminded me of an Italian Wegmans.  I could have easily just continued the rest of the date there.  Instead we headed out to SD26 for our reservation.

As we were walking there I made a simple observation…Chef saw my outfit and commented on the boots I was wearing (ones with heels)…and yet as we are navigating the snow/slush/ice covered sidewalks and street corners he never once tries to make sure I don’t slip and crack my head.  There was fucking slush oceans at the corners when we had to cross and he just watched as I ballerina leaped over them.  Thank god for all the years of dance I took that I was able to successfully leap, gracefully, no less over the slushy abyss.  Yeah, don’t worry about me, ass.

We walk into the restaurant and I begin watching Chef closely…waiting for a particular moment.  Which moment you may ask?  The one in which he takes his hat off.  Why?  Well, in his profile he had a hat on in every single picture.  I didn’t think much of this at first and after revisiting his profile a couple of times (anyone who does online dating is probably familiar with this move…you just need to keep brushing up on what they say…or double check that they are still cute) it started to occur to me…oh shit I wonder if he’s bald.  Well, here we are checking in with the host and I can see his hand, nearly shaking, slowly heading to grab his hat.  And BAM!!!  There it was.  A perfectly shiny, top of his head.  Now, to be fair, he’s not completely bald…though it would be better if he were.  He’s got that situation going on (not sure if there is an actual name for it) where he’s bald on top and has the remaining ring of hair on the bottom…thank god he didn’t attempt a comb over.  But ladies take note…if a guy is wearing a hat in every single picture I’d say chances are he’s hiding something (or he just likes hats but that’s boring)! 

Now, please don’t think I’m an asshole for all of this.  I find nothing wrong with being bald and sympathize with men who are losing their hair, especially at such a young age…Chef is only 30 (and a lot of what he has left is going grey so double sucks for him there).  In fact my sister’s boyfriend is bald…by choice really…he bics his head because I think some of his hair was thinning so he just said screw it and went bald.  I think that all men should do that.  It tends to look a lot better than trying to hold on to and salvage whatever little suckers are trying to hold on.  Frankly, I find anything else distracting.

And that’s exactly what happened.  We’re sitting down at our table and having lovely conversation.  Truly good banter back and forth.  Yet I’m so insanely distracted by his head…think the mole scene in Austin Powers.  It was awful.  I opted to focus more on the food and the wine which, by the way you order on an IPAD!!!!  This was seriously fucking cool…the waiter comes and brings an ipad to your table and you can order your wine from it and magically someone then brings it to you.  Technology meets fine dining…amazing.

So, our meals come and I had made an agreement to try one of the things he ordered.  Never blindly agree to try something a former Chef orders!  Because what did I get to taste…oh yes, cheek.  Fucking CHEEK!!!!  Who eats shit like that?  Well, I’ll be honest…it wasn’t the worst tasting thing I’ve ever tried…frankly, I’d have another piece of that before I eat a mushroom…but it had a weird after taste…almost like blood or something. Barf.  But hey, I was adventurous and tried something new so go me! And thanks to the Chef for the encouragement.

As we leave the restaurant after a very lovely meal, damn your stupid hair Chef for tainting my attraction, he does the gentlemanly thing of walking me to my car (right across the street and a few feet down the block).  A part of me knew that he was probably hoping for a kiss and the other part knew he’d be left disappointed.  But all that thinking was quickly surpassed by what I saw when I walked up to my car…

It was SMASHED!!!!  Someone hit it and left the scene.  No notes, no sorry, no chocolates or flowers because they felt bad.  Just my bumper nearly falling off, the lights smashed and my trim in the middle of the street.  How could someone DO THIS?!?!?  My car is practically brand new, I just leased it in June and someone had just rear ended me a month ago so WHAT THE FUCK?!?  Its like karma was kicking my ass for something I did that I can’t remember.

So, I did my best to play it cool while the Chef was still there and immediately went to call my insurance company.  I told him he didn’t have to stay because I had no idea how long this would take.  The agent answered really quickly and as I tried to talk to her and hug Chef goodbye he still had the balls to try and go in for a kiss.  Really dude, REALLY??  Not exactly the right time.

The Juicy Details:  I felt so terrible for just dismissing Chef the way that I did.  I didn’t even properly thank him for dinner (which he paid for) and an all in all nice evening…which is so not like me.  Just the stressful situation got the best of me and I really wanted him to leave before I either flipped my shit or burst into tears.  I do not need someone I just met seeing me like that nor feeling like he needs to somehow “deal with” that.  So I sent him a text the next day apologizing and saying I had a lovely time, thank you  blah blah.  He wished me a happy ski weekend and asked me to keep him updated about what I was doing.  Umm, no.  we just met I will not be checking in or updating you.  Sorry.  He did try to call me the following week but despite the hair situation, which I’m sorry again, definitely dulls my attraction (to each his own yes?) please don’t think I’m an asshole…I just wasn’t feeling it.  He’s a really great guy…just not meant to be my guy.  

You're Far Too Kind...

I have said it before and I'll say it again...I love making out.  Sometimes though...and its rare...something will come along that is even more satisfying then a good make out...right now, its an amazing blog award from the wonderful Alice X at The Boyfriend Drama.  Her blog is always entertaining and fun to read with posts like Why Men Are Like Cheese.  She is sweeter then a cupcake for giving me this award and I thank her so very much for it!!!




Now onto the tough part...the survey.  This award is no joke...you need to answer 10 questions about yourself which really get you to think...and write and write and write....


Hope you enjoy!!!!

Rules:
1. Thank the person (people) that gave you the award. 

2. Answer 10 survey questions.

3. Pass along the award to bloggers you think are fantastic.

4. Let those bloggers know you have given them an award.

1.     If you blog anonymously, are you happy about doing this? If you aren't anonymous, do you wish that you had started out anonymously, so you could be anonymous now?
I blog anonymously…after all whose real name is Pretty Young Thing?!  I will admit that I had decided to blog anonymously initially out of fear that my ex or any of his moronic friends would come across my blog and judge me..so keeping who I am under wraps was the best way to try and prevent that.  Typing that explanation now makes me feel utterly ridiculous but part of that just comes from the hindsight of the situation…in the moment I was definitely panic stricken that he would find it and make fun of me…aaahhh how things change.  At this time I’m happy about doing the anonymous thing in the sense that perhaps when it comes to writing some “dirty” details it makes it a little easier…but now that the fear of my ex reading it is gone I almost don’t care anymore…plus its sometimes a pain in the ass to use code names for everyone.  But at this point its just my thing.  Maybe it’ll change one day.

2.      Describe the incident that shows your stubborn side. 
My last relationship?  Almost every day I feel I hear my mother tell me how “damn stubborn” I am.  To pick out one particular incident would almost be unfair because I can be stubborn about anything.  It really can be a fault some…ok, most…of the time.  As much as I’d like to make it a joke…the gods honest truth is that my last relationship is an excellent example of an incident that very clearly depicts my stubborn side.  I did not want to fail.  I did not want his friends or my friends or anyone to be right.  I did not want him to be the fucking piece of shit he proved he was time and again.  With every piece of me I had I was bound to prove everyone wrong…to shed my fears, my doubts, my lack of trust and faith…and I was going to show everyone that we are meant to be, he is the love of my life and we are happy.

Fuck you stubbornness. 

The one good thing I suppose is that I learned A LOT.  So while I walked away with regrets, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t,  at least some good came from it.

3.     What do you see when you really look into the mirror?

Someone who needs to get reacquainted with the gym before vacation in a month. 

But really…someone who needs to learn how to put herself and her emotions first more often…and as my sister would say “stop being so fucking nice all the time” 

4.     What is your favorite cold summer drink?
how to pick just one….I’d have to go with Ice Tea…of the raspberry or ice tea/lemonade flavor (add rum for extra fun!) 

5.      When you take time for yourself, what do you do?
oh boy…umm, I’d love to sound really awesome and say something like go to the gym but while that is something I do for myself I think the more proper answer is…blast my music and dance (not kidding)…I also try to take dance classes, watch movies on my couch with my favorite blanket and snacks (I’m a total piglet), make my friends go out with me on weird adventures…that’s enough for now

6.      Is there something you still want to accomplish in your life?
Being I’m only in my 20s not only do I have a list of things I still want to accomplish but there are constantly things which are still added to it.  There are things which range from fun (ie – fly a plane (which I’m doing in the spring), go to Greece/Spain/London) to emotional (ie – get married, start a family) to occupational (ie – move up in my career, potentially get another degree, volunteer).  I pray I have enough time!

7.      When you attended school, were you the class clown, the overachiever, the shy person, or always ditching?
I can’t remember a time in my life when I’ve ever been shy.  I love being the center of attention…even as a kid I used to put on dance performances for my family while they were eating dinner.  I also wouldn’t be defined as the class clown.  I’m funny but I never “clowned around” so to say.  I did participate in senior cut day but otherwise wasn’t much of a ditcher.  I always had my go-to teachers who would write me notes to get me out of any class I didn’t want to be in…typically when there was a sub.  So that leaves me with overachiever…which as it would be is fairly accurate.  I was involved in cheerleading, swimming and track.  I participated in clubs, student council and created a charity dance.  I did plays, was a peer educator, lifeguard, swim instructor and volunteered at the hospital.  I’m getting tired just writing all this.  God I was an asshole. 

8.     If you closed your eyes and wanted to visualize a very poignant moment in your life, what would you see?
Well I’m not sure if this is something that has happened or will happen.  I would expect that in the future moments like saying I do or holding a baby for the first time would answer this.  As with something that’s already happened…I had this entire paragraph written about a high profile award I won for a science project I did when I was younger.  Then giving it some thought I decided a more truthful moment would be the one where I realized my ex was not who I thought he was.  It rocked my world to the core and affected the way I saw a lot of things.  It was more than just accepting the truth about our relationship and the disappointment in watching it crumble right in front of me…it was coming to terms with the fact that when someone shows you who they are over and over again, you should believe them.  You can’t make someone be who they are not no matter how much love you give, time you invest or how many tears you shed.  Realizing this little fact of life changed me and made me a much stronger person who is much more protective and cautious of who I give my heart to.  I don’t feel so desperate to make someone be right for me, I’m much happier alone.  So, to my ex…thank you for being the asshole you are.

9.     Is it easy for you to share your true self in your blog, or are you more comfortable writing posts about other people and events?
its surprisingly easy for me to share exactly who I am.  The few times I’ve considered masking the truth or not sharing a story or a feeling I realized I felt more conflicted about it then just telling the whole story.  I find that being anything less than honest just doesn’t feel right.  Once I start a post all of who I am just goes right into it…I write the way I speak to its almost like I’m talking to you when I’m writing.  The words just pour out and when I’m done I can read it and know, yeah that’s me.

10.   If you had a choice to sit down and read a book or talk on the phone, which would you do and why?
This is tough since I actually enjoy both.  I think it would depend where I am.  I’ve found that it’s hard for me to read at home.  I love reading while commuting or traveling but can’t seem to focus at home.  I’m not one who can read before bed.  As for the phone I definitely enjoy phone conversations…it’s the next best thing to being in person in my opinion.  I have a few friends I talk to everyday on the phone and with online dating it’s something that’s inevitable since you’ll want to have at least one conversation with someone before you meet them.  There are some days where I want to just chuck my phone out the window because too many people are calling me or the side of my face feels like its burning from the heat of the phone being on it too long…oh the sacrifices we make.

And the Winners are....

Be Awesome Instead - Hutch is seriously awesome and if you haven't read her blog you need to.  She'll make you laugh and wish you could one day be even close to as awesome as she is.  Her hamburger alerts are seriously one of the funniest things I read on blogs.

Learning From Self History - Matt...oh this boy just melts my heart.  He is so sincere and honest and a wonderful writer.  You will be completely hooked on his stories and find yourself cheering for him at the end of every post.  I have a total blog crush on him.

Date Me, D.C.!  - Katie is such a trip.  She dates and dates and gets some pretty amazing stories out of it.  Her style is insanely entertaining and its hard to get enough (her graphs are the shit).  If you live in the DC area she throws awesome HH...or so I hear.  I'd love to co-host one with her here in NYC (hear that Katie?!)

Go on and indulge in those blogs above and thank me later!!

And That Happened.....

I really can’t believe I’m still trying to catch up to real time at this point.  Work has been crazy, life has been crazy and you all are a casualty of the craziness.  I think after this I’ll have two more stories to catch you up on and then we are good to go…no wait, make that three. God DAMN IT!!! 

Well, let’s get started and maybe, since this post is fairly short and sweet I, I can get out two posts today and only have two left.  I’m already exhausted…where is my red bull?

So, Gryph and I hadn’t had a good night out in a while…as you can probably tell by the lack of my mentioning him on here.  He actually called me out on it yesterday…something to the effect of “Hey read the blog a little today, boring, I’m nowhere in it!”  It is true that stories which he is involved in do make for excellent reading…but in my defense I would say that things have still been pretty interesting around here despite the shortage of Gryph (sorry buddy!).

To rectify the lack of Gryph in my life and since he would be missing my AC celebration, we scheduled a little birthday par-tay for the Saturday after my bday.  I made my way to his Hoboken apartment with a mixer in hand prepared from some good pregame action.  As always, I barely have my coat off and Gryph is pulling out glasses to make us drinks…it’s no surprise why we get along so well.  I wish I had taken a picture of this but when he opens his freezer it just screamed bachelor.  There was not one ounce of food in there…the entire freezer was filled with liquor…bottles on top of bottles.  I was impressed….and jealous.  We pull out a new bottle of rum, plop on the couch and start watching this show called “Blue Mountain State” which I must say is fucking hilarious.  If you haven’t seen it set up your DVR or put it on Netflix…you can thank me later.  We then progress to SVU so I can teach him the SVU drinking game.  All the while my cup never seems to empty and I’m losing track of how much I’m drinking.  And then we made out.  Yeah, that happened.  Nothing new though.  It’s just one of those things that sometimes happens.  Don’t you just love friends like that?

Finally my friend A-Bomb arrives.  This may be the first time I’m mentioning her on this blog so here is a super quick intro.  She is a twin and I
 met her through her twin sister who went to college with me.  She is one of the sweetest, most generous, fun people you can ever meet.  Also, you can’t spend an evening with her without doing at least one Jaeger bomb.  It’s just a fact of life.  So naturally when she walks into Gryph’s apartment she had a big thermos of Jaeger and a pack of red bull.  God Bless Her.  As Gryph was grabbing some shot glasses to prepare the bombs I reach over to grab the rum and offer A-Bomb a drink…please note, since Gryph and I started drinking I haven’t stood up once and completely lost track of how much he’s been serving me…so it came as a huge shock to see the bottle was EMPTY.  Umm….”Hey Gryph…did we just kill an entire fucking bottle of rum???”  Yes, yes we did.  Wow.  As I stand up it all quickly hits me.  Ok, I drank a lot.  Well, fuck it…time for some bombs.

After we down the bombs and maybe another drink we head out.  Once at the bar I’m handed a beer…maybe another shot…clearly the night is starting to get fuzzy.  Suddenly, A-Bomb is nowhere to be found and the bouncer tells me she’s not allowed in because she is too drunk.  Bullshit.  I can’t understand this being that I’ve drank enough to kill a small horse and she’s only just gotten started and has an extremely high tolerance.  WTF Bouncer!!!  Inside I had started talking to this guy who looked like he walked right off the pages of a Ralph Lauren catalog and didn’t want to stop so I made a quick and rather convincing speech about why he should ditch his friends and come with us.  So off we go to recover A-Bomb from outside with Ralph in tow. 

I realized the next day via conversation and the stamp on my hand that we actually went to Whiskey Bar (one of my favs) at this point.  Yet, all I remember is going to Johnny Rockets and watching Ralph eat a burger.  I must have ate something at well since there was definitely ketchup on my fingers…what a fucking mess.    I wouldn’t even find me attractive at this point.  Ralph and I head back to Gryph’s place where he and A-Bomb already were. 

Ralph and I find ourselves nice and cozy on the couch and once Gryph’s door is shut the make-out sesh began.  Okay, so it wasn’t just a make out sesh.  We had…a good time.  No, I did not sleep with him…well, slept next to him…briefly.  It’s not like me to commandeer my friends furniture and hook up with random men so I completely blame the alcohol (oops).  And just to seal the deal on this ridiculous situation mid hook up Ralph is shirtless on top of me, kissing my neck and I’m enjoying every second…then I hear a noise and look up to lock eyes with Gryph who just came out of his room.  My heart skipped a beat and something along the lines of “oh fuck” ran through my head as I stared at one of my best friends in one of the most compromising positions.  The feeling was fleeting since it didn’t exactly stop me from continuing to make out with Ralph.  Perhaps it was because Gryph’s face said he really didn’t give a shit…he’s cool like that…but more likely because I was wasted, Ralph was hot and I was so unapologetically into what he was doing.  I profusely apologized to Gryph in the AM since I really did feel bad and if he’s reading…Gryph sorry again!  But thanks for the couch ;-)

Come the morning, after a few more kisses (which is gross since we just woke up)….(thank you god for still making him cute in the AM)…he asked for my number and said he’d love to hang out next week.  Typically I’d be so happy about this…but for some unexplained reason this morning I think I grew a penis because all I could think of was…”wait, you want to keep in touch and see me again?”  I thought, hey we had a fun night…great memories (well the ones that are still intact anyway)…leave it at that and move along.  Who am I and what did I do with myself??

Well I gave him my number and he texted later that day and for a few days thereafter.  Eventually I stopped responding, I guess my penis came out again, and he got the hint.  I’m not sure what my deal was…but that’s completely uncharacteristic of me.  Shit happens.  One to the next victim one.