Thursday, July 29, 2010

We click like a Pin and a Stripe....

Well, as I mentioned Pinstripe followed through on his promise and sent me a text…and another and another, etc…but very infrequently…so infrequently that this boy was testing my patience (of which I really have none).  My friends tell me all the time that when you first meet someone its common that you speak and communicate sparingly.  I just don’t get this concept…I can’t really wrap my head around it.  The way I function is less with the games and more with this is how it is and take it or leave it…I wouldn't say I wear my heart on my sleeve but I'm not very good at repressing or hiding my feelings...perhaps this is a contributor to my lack of success?  Who knows.  But either way Pinstripe would text one day, I’d respond the next…insert another day or two of silence and more of the same…wash, rinse, repeat.  I ultimately got to the point where I was annoyed and getting seriously bored with this.  Is this guy ever going to say anything other than mundane bullshit…if he asked me one more time about my weekend or made one more joke about shots or anything pertaining to do with the night we met without asking me to hang out I was going to freak.

So, being the person I am (blunt and honest about my feelings) I sent him a text one Friday afternoon saying “So are we ever actually going to grab drinks again?”…and just as soon as I hit send I realize…fuck, I STILL don’t know his NAME!!!  I’ve now placed myself into a mini panic trying to find a way to get around this in the event he agrees to get together.  What have I done?  And just as I started to calm myself down…hell froze over…I get a text back from Pinstripe which said “If you can tell me my name, we can go out.”  YOU’VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!!  Did I read that right?  Is this really happening?  I can’t even begin to guess what his name is, how am I going to respond to this?  I consider deleting the text and acting like I never got it…or making some kind of joke…and then I somehow come up with this “genius” response…”How about we play the what was I wearing, what do I do game?”  Clearly he’s onto me and there is no reason at this point to pretend otherwise and in the long run make myself look like a real idiot…so I came up with the cutest, most flirty way to admit he’s right without actually saying so. 

Just as my girls and I are clanking our glasses together to toast to my cleverness my phone starts vibrating and its Pinstripe!!  Cue mini panic button again.  Now, let me put this situation into perspective for you…its Friday night, probably around 9:30 or so…I’m out with my girlfriends and we had been drinking since happy hour…I was in no shape to have a decent conversation with a guy whose name I do not know.  But thankfully the conversation went fabulously.  We chatted, I learned his name, we joked a bit and we agreed to get together soon. 

After that conversation things just went full throttle…the texts got more frequent, he sent me cute pictures, we chatted on the phone a bit (I’m talking marathon conversations…like when your cell starts burning your ear) and more and more I start to grow to really like this guy…well, as much as you can like someone your ‘text dating’.  Yes, I made that up so just go with it.  The more we talk the better he gets…the fact is I felt like I knew more about him then guys I’ve gone on multiple dates with.  He made me laugh constantly, totally made me blush with texts like “Have I told you lately I like you”  it seemed too good to be real.

Finally we make plans to get together.  We were supposed to go see a band and meet up with a bunch of his friends.  I meet him at his apartment and one glass of wine got refilled one too many times and we end up skipping the show.  We were so caught up in conversation that there were no distractions necessary.  I completely left it up to him if he wanted to go or not since he wanted to see the band and it was his friends we were meeting.  But he chose to stay.  Somehow the conversation turned to sore muscles or massages or something along those lines (and stop rolling your eyes, this is the oldest trick in the book I know)…and before I know it I was rubbing his back and then we are full on making out.  It was like a month of tension built up over the phone was just pouring out.  It was fabulous and I was totally getting my make-out fix.  Props to Pinstripe for being a good kisser.

Eventually its 3:30am…not really eventually more like suddenly…I felt like the last time I checked the clock it was 11:30 so how the hell did 4hrs pass?!?  Time flies so they say.  Well I realize I need to get going before I fall asleep there or while I’m driving home…neither of which would be ok…time to break myself away and be responsible.  Pinstripe is a total gentleman and walks me to my car and we say good night. 

The Juicy Details:  The following week I’m crazy busy and I suppose he was as well because our texts are fairly infrequent but I think nothing of it until I get a message from him saying “Sorry, work week is crushing me”  I respond the next day assuring him its not a big deal and to hang in there since there is one day left.  Then the kicker…1am Thursday night/Friday morning I get a text (which I don’t see until I wake up to pee at 3am) which says “Sorry I have been lacking in response…things just got a little weird with an ex girlfriend of mine and I’m trying to sort it out”  HUH??  So, I spend the next day stressing about how I respond to something like when I can’t even figure out why he felt it was necessary to tell me that.  We met once, briefly, we have hung out once since then…we are not in a serious relationship let alone any form of a relationship on any level…there is such a thing as being too honest and there are points in time when even the most open and honest people need to learn that full disclosure is not always necessary or welcomed.  So, eventually I respond “Ok”  Fact is, as much as I want to see Pinstripe again he has really thrown me for a loop and I have some serious mixed emotions…that coupled with the fact that even though most try to tell me otherwise I truly believe he may have just changed his mind and that was the best excuse he could come up with…instead of taking the mature road and just saying so (I've never really understood the beat-around-the-bush act).  I suppose we’ll see what happens but in the meantime I have no expectations of him ever contacting me again.  You win some, you lose some.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Pinstripes...not just for Yankees

I’m not a big believer or fan of meeting someone who is potential relationship material in a bar.  I’m not saying its impossible or its 100% unsuccessful, however, in my experience and honest opinion I give it two enthusiastic thumbs down.  Sure you can find a hottie to bust some moves on a dance floor with, maybe you’ll kiss…and if its your thing maybe you’ll be doing the walk of shame in the morning…who knows.  But meeting your next SO…I think not.  I know it happens, I have friends who are successful…and maybe I’m being too harsh or too much of a skeptic but its just not for me.

Imagine my surprise when one night I actually meet someone out at a bar.  I’m out with Ox (which is always a blast & always trouble of the best kind) and we are bouncing from place to place…by the point we walk into one of our favorite spots we’re definitely feeling pretty good.  As the night goes on I head to the bar to grab a beer and as I turn my head towards the door I see this guy walk in.  He’s a very nice looking guy but definitely not my type by looks alone…he’s got the height but the rest is a little off.  Well, he either caught me staring or he just happened to walk over and stand near me but I’m going with the former since I know I have a heavy and obvious stare....and this is where it all began.  See, this guy waltzes into this very casual, very laid back Irish bar in a button down and pinstripe suit.  I was baffled and had the liquid courage to tell him so.  It went a little something like this:

PYT: Why the fuck are you wearing a pinstripe suit to the bar?

Pinstripe: Um, excuse me?? (clearly stunned that a random girl was being such a bitch)

PYT: What are you doing here in a pinstripe suit?  Don’t you think it’s a bit much?

Pinstripe:  I just got off of work.

PYT: what? Its like 10:30 on a Friday, what are you like a lawyer?
(now, don’t ask me why the first thing that came to my head is a lawyer but it was, so lets roll with it)

Pinstripe: Um no, I work in the music industry
(at this point I’m getting bored because I think he’s just making shit up, so I continue being a total snot)

PYT: Oh yeah right, I’m sure…so describe what you do.

So he proceeds to describe his job which actually sounded pretty cool and then asked if I wanted a shot.  Wow, after all that he still wants to buy me a drink…can’t turn that down.  I’m still not feeling interested in him in the sense of being really attracted or picturing us on our first date but its been fun to banter back and forth.  Finally he pulls out his phone as asked me for my number.  Now I proceed to break out my skepticism and blabber on about how men never call or text like they promise and its stupid to give out your number blah blah blah.  How this guy didn't walk away or pour a beer over my head by this point still shocks me.  Anyway, he persists and says he really needs to go and change because he’s dying of heat…to which I naturally respond “Yeah no shit your wearing that pinstripe suit in the bar.”  Why am I so obsessed with this damn suit?!  Anyway, Pinstripe gets my number…he asked me to enter it and fill in the names completely…so I put my first name, nickname (he requested for god knows what reason lol) and used the name of the bar as my last name because at the time it seemed logical…now he’ll remember where he met me.  Fantastic.  Pinstripe leaves along with my number, I head back over to Ox, grab another beer and don’t give him a second thought since I already put him in the ‘that was fun in the moment’ category.

The Juicy Details:  Well, not too much to say after this encounter except that he actually did text as promised.  We exchanged a couple of messages that night and once again I didn’t think I’d hear from him after that.  Until the next day when he sent another message.  I had one issue…if this was going to continue I was in trouble since I never saved his number in my phone the night before because I knew it was him at the time…I had completely forgotten his name by morning.  Shit.  So, now I’m texting this guy whose name I don’t know wondering if it will eventually come and bite me in the ass…guess we’ll find out.

Monday, July 26, 2010

The Office...Episode 2

At some point it was bound to happen…I had a second date.  Hallelujah!  A man I actually want to see again and who feels the same towards me.  I don’t want to get carried away but maybe all hope isn’t lost for men. 

There is something I’ve always liked about second dates.  I mean I really like first dates (and no, I’m not just saying that) but second dates are exciting.  The anticipation of seeing someone who just gave you butterflies, made you smile, got you to blush or occupied your thoughts throughout the next day is hard to beat.  You’re at a higher level of comfort where you can ask deeper questions, talk more freely, sit a little closer and let your touch linger a little longer.  Its more affectionate and more fun.  The only part that leaves me uneasy is the first hello…if you kissed goodbye on the first date do you kiss hello on the second?  I’ve found this varies on a case by case basis and I always let the guy make the first move.  So it’s like a sweet little surprise when he plants one right on you when he sees you…like oh my gosh he was definitely just as excited to see me…if not, you get to build up more anticipation as you wait for that first second date kiss. 

Jim had planned for us to get dinner and then have drinks on a roof deck…two great ideas, especially in the summer.  One of the biggest struggles I’ve been facing in my dating life is the time I leave work compared to the rest of your average working population with the exception of teachers and I guess maybe people such as doctors, nurses, firemen or police  depending on their shift.  I am out of work at 3:30…granted I go in at 7am…but I get out nice and early in return.  Whenever I have a date planned it always means that I’m going to have a bunch of time to kill before the date.  So in this case we had plans to meet around 6:30ish and it was only going to take me about 20-30min to get by his apartment.  So I killed some time at work and stayed late and even still I ended up with over an hour to myself.  Thankfully there was a pier nearby so I was able to sit and relax by the water till Jim got off the train.

Once he got there we took a quick run up to his apt so he could drop off his bag…his room was immaculate btw, so very clean and organized it made me feel like a slacker and my room is typically put together…good sign.  Finally we get to dinner at this sweet little Cuban place and the conversation just goes full force.  I found out so much about him and vice versa, on a level I never expected.  He made me laugh, impressed me and even shocked me a bit.  There was more to him I would have never guessed.  We spent a couple of hours at dinner because we just got so caught up.  He had this way of looking at me and just got me all kinds of tickled and I couldn’t get enough.

When we finally leave the restaurant we’re both surprised to see that its pouring outside.  He’s in a button down and slacks…I’m in a cute ruffled dressed and heels…neither of us has an umbrella.  Well, I said what the hell, lets just walk...I’m no prima donna and a little water wont kill me, plus I really do love the rain...not necessarily in a dress and heels but who am I to be picky.  So we walk hand in hand through the rain…stop for a few kisses which is just wonderful…then he asked if I want to go back and hang out at his place since clearly roof top drinks couldn’t happen.  At that moment I was so torn, I swear there was a devil and angel sitting on my shoulders.  On the one hand I really didn’t want the night to end, we were having a great time and I really wanted to take the opportunity to get to know him better and as I've mentioned I am a sucker for good kisses and I would have loved nothing more then to snuggle on the couch and just make out high school style (yes, I just said that...and yes, I'm serious...just think about it for a minute and how fun it really could be...)…now, on the other hand I heard one of my best friends Ox in my head when he once told me “Anytime I get a girl back to my apartment I know I got it in the bag.” or something to that effect.  Translation…he knows he can get her in bed if he wants to.  Now clearly this isn’t true for every guy and clearly he doesn’t mean that’s true for every girl but for some reason it was enough to freak myself out….I didn’t want to be THAT girl.  So, I voiced my struggle with him, he begged me to stay and I ultimately decided to leave.  Always leave them wanting more right??  But does that apply when you leave yourself wanting more as well?? Stupid.

I tried to justify leaving in my own head by saying it was a good thing to go while it wasn't raining too hard and it wasn't too late since I wasn't 100% sure how to get home from where we were.  Forget about making out high school style I was acting with the maturity level of someone in high school...I'm an adult, I dont have a curfew, what in the shit was I thinking???  I regretted my decision the entire way home and sent him a txt to tell him I wish I had stayed out of fear he would think I was blowing him off and wasn’t interested.  I hope it worked.

The Juicy Details:  Kissing in the rain is amazing.  Kissing Jim in the rain was so fun.  I could have stood there kissing for as long as my body temperature could stand it.  After my text he replied that we would do it again soon…always good to hear.  So, now we wait and see if there will ever be a third date with Jim...though I couldn't completely blame him if there wasn't after what I pulled.

The Office...Episode 1

So, had I not become a complete slacker, taking laziness and procrastination to new heights this post would have actually been a lot longer and written a couple weeks ago.  Since its been a while since these events occurred and even though my memory is still fresh…my attempt to catch up on what’s been going on is overriding my desire to provide you with an overwhelming amount of detail.  So the next few posts will be more like summaries just so I can get back into real-time…and because I’m extremely impatient and can’t be bothered with the past.  Sorry!

Rewind back to the end of June.  I start talking to this great guy who we will call…hold on while I google the characters name…Jim Halpert…from The Office…a show I’ve watched once or twice but never got into.  You’ll understand the reference shortly.  Jim seemed like a great guy.  He made me laugh, was extremely driven and successful and seemed so sweet.  We were finally able to make plans after some time of talking…he and I had conflicting schedules for a couple of weeks…and I was really looking forward to finally getting to meet him.

The morning comes when we are supposed to meet and I get a message saying “Would you absolutely hate me if I had to cancel?”  Bastard.  I sometimes get these weird feelings and can almost anticipate things before they happen…does this happen with a lot of people?  I had a feeling the night before that he was going to cancel but wasn’t sure if I was being insecure or realistic, so when that message came it sent me into such a tizzy.  Well, he explained there was a server down at work and his day just turned into a living hell and he wasn’t sure how late he was going to have to stay.  Long story short I told him that regardless if we hang out or not I’d be in the city anyway and we can just play the evening by ear.

As I’m en route to the city that afternoon he tells me he’s probably going to have to stay in the office but he really wouldn’t mind a visitor.  I thought he was joking but no, he was totally serious.  He wanted me to come and hang out in his office for a bit.  I gave him credit for working with what he had and trying his best not to cancel but was really skeptical about going to see some guy (who I never met) at his office.  What if he kills me and stuffs me in an air duct?  Yes, this went through my mind.  But when I finally shook the thought I said, fuck it…live a little and go. 

I can honestly say it was a great decision.  I would never recommend doing this intentionally but having a first date in his office was awesome.  There was nothing to distract us, no drinks to cloud judgment, great lighting to see him well and it turned out it was just the two of us there.  We just talked and 2hours melted away.  If I didn’t have to run out of there like Cinderella from the ball to go and pay the meter I know we could have sat there all night.  Next time.

The Juicy Details:  While we were both so disappointed I had to leave so quickly and he was stuck working we reassured each other we’d definitely go out again.  He walked me to the door and we had a long, tight hug.  As we were standing there reluctant to say goodbye he sweetly grabs my hands, pulls me in and put my arms around his neck and we kiss.  Just thinking about it now puts a smile on my face…it was the sweetest kiss…and I couldn’t wait till we could do it again.  In case I haven't mentioned it already...I'm a total sucker for good kisses...I like them more than most things so a guy being a good kisser and active kisser is extremely important.  For instance, my ex was a great kisser but I was constantly forced to beg to be kissed...I felt frustrated and could a person not want to kiss??  It was a constant area where we butted heads and stood at a roadblock...everyone is different and it came down to the fact that I think I'm just a more passionate person then he is, to each his own...but moving fwd awesome, frequent kisses are a must have and so far Jim has the awesome down.
Ps- on the way back to my car I got a txt from him saying how wonderful it was to meet me and he couldn’t wait to see me again…score! 

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder....?

I should probably be placed in blogging purgatory for how long I have been away from my newbie blog!  I have a lot to update and quite a few posts that I owe to myself and you.  To make excuses for being away would be lame and unnecessary.  I will simply just say...I'm sorry!!!  and that I am going to do the best I can to "catch up" and hopefully bring things up to speed to where they are now.  I have soo much on my mind and my fingers can't quite move fast enough.  If I tried to get my thoughts out as quickly as they are getting through my head I'd be a little scared of the end result...its total chaos up there.

So, stick with me as I try to make sense of the past few weeks and get together as many details as possible.  If I can just focus for a few hours (and yes, I am at work but things are slow so I'm being productive in other, more personal, ways...) I should hopefully get you a couple of solid posts.

Thanks for reading!!