Monday, May 23, 2011

Forget You!!!

In an attempt to stop being so "careful" and so worried about what others may think I've been trying to be a little more daring, more open, more what the fuck let's do it with my life.  Yes, it sounds careless and perhaps on some level it is.  But taking care hasn't left me feeling anymore empowered or excited about being single then being a little more bold would, in fact I'd feel its safe to say I have more regrets about not doing things then doing them, so switching things up seemed like a great plan.  After all I had a great week getting to know the Marine because of it!

So, when Friday came and the Rival (who I've been texting with sporadically since our first date) asked me to get a couple of girlfriends and join him and his friends for Beer Olympics..I gave it a quick thought and said sure!  I gathered up two of my best single girls and we made our way to the Upper East Side backyard.

When we finally arrived "fashionably" an hour late...not purposely...the party was in full swing.  The Rival enthusiastically greeted my friends and I and got us acquainted and set up with everything that was going on.  My plan for the afternoon was to just have fun.  I figured that when the Rival wanted to/had the time he would come over and hang with me but the fact was he was with his friends, I had only met him once - a month ago, and this was a competition (beer olympics) my expectations weren't high for us interacting.

As it happened we spent a little time together and most of our talking was done across a Beirut table while our teams played one another.  I constantly caught him staring at me which was flattering and also nerve-wracking since I kept praying I wasn't doing something retarded.

The party was going really well and everyone was having a totally blast.  It was really great to see the Rival in his "natural setting" if you will and watch him interacting with his friends and totally letting his guard down.  I just kept thinking how very much my type he was seeming to be and how I was looking forward to continue getting to know him.  Until I couldn't find him.

Everyone, except for a few who were too drunk to care, had run inside once mother nature decided to fuck us over and drop an awesome amount of rain on our heads.  I was upstairs with a bunch of Rivals friends and suddenly realized I hadn't seen him since we all came inside.  I quickly looked around, trying my best to totally play it cool, and finally broke down and asked his friend (who was one of the hosts of the party) if he'd seen him...apparently he had left...and didn't say goodbye??  My face must have immediately shown my emotions as his friend tried to play damage control.  He tried to reassure me he didn't say goodbye to anyone and I shouldn't feel bad and he was so wasted.  Now, I can attest to the fact that he was completely drunk out of his mind.  His team was undefeated in Beirut which means they were playing around after round for over 4 whatever other side drinks they had on top of it.  I was watching the Rival throughout the afternoon and while he was adorable he was a bit of a hot mess.  But I'm sorry, he's too old for that to be a valid excuse.

So, I did what any girl who was ditched would and shot him a text...I would have called but it was loud and I wasn't in the mood for a drunk phone call...

Me: ummm, did you leave????

Rival: yeah, I had my, I went home

(fucking asshole)

Me: no goodbye??

Rival: i had been running from the rain with everyone and I didn't see you

Me: mhm

Me: thats bullshit honestly, if you wanted to find me you could have

Rival: oh wow you totally called me out

Me: should I pretend??

Rival: possibly

(grow the fuck're 31 be responsible for your actions)

Me: why pretend?

Rival: not pretending, just didn't say bye

Me: yeah, not cool

Me: Listen have a great night, your friends were awesome, thanks for the invite!!

Now, perhaps thanking him for inviting me to a party which he didn't make an extreme effort to spend time with me at, which he didn't try to put us on the same team for, which he just fucking up and left without so much as letting me know was stupid.  But regardless of his fuck up I still had a blast and the thanks was written with extreme sarcasm.  He himself was a massive disappointment.  And frankly, while I get his position on wanting to become friends with a girl before he dates her, this is not acceptable behavior even for a friend...and most certainly not for a girl you should be trying to impress.  You are a 31 year old professional with 3 masters degrees and therefore even as a drunken mess should have the wherewithal to at least let the person you invited to a party where you were the only one she knew that you were leaving.  Common fucking courtesy.  Whats worse is, he didn't even try to use being drunk as an excuse...he just tried to blow it off which makes him even more of an ass.

His friend who told me the Rival most likely left was doing his best to stand up for his friend while making sure I was ok.  He was trying to make me feel slightly better while I was trying to let him know I wasn't there under the impression the Rival was going to be my boyfriend and my disappointment stems from the complete lack of respect and thought his friend showed me.  I'd feel the same even if one of my best girlfriends did that to me.  I think anyone would.  Luckily I had two friends there with me and I'm a bit of a social butterfly so its not like I was left alone feeling helpless...I was more then ok.

In fact, amidst my aggravation I must have broke out some kind of charm because the Rivals friend apparently totally fell for me.  He had asked me for my number before I left...I had protested because I had been on a date with his friend, who also invited me there...but if he wanted to be friends that was cool.  He assured me it was a friendly gesture.  Until later that night I was getting texts from a random number, which turned out to be his, telling me "I really like you" and so on.  We chatted yesterday as well and he was trying to get me to come hang out with him and some friends in the city.  I had to decline being that I was with my girlfriends at a BBQ in NJ.  I told him I'd love to take a rain check for later in the week....he said he was game.  So we shall see ladies and gentleman.  (ps - while I remember him being really cute I also remember thinking he might be gay and then found out he designs shoes for Nine West which I'm sorry to stereotype heightened my suspicions...damn it!) 

I'll admit that I am curious to see if I will hear from the Rival again.  I know I called him out on not saying goodbye and frankly I don't feel bad about it.  He was great...till he wasn't.  I swear this situation walked right off the pages of "He's Just Not That Into You"...guy invites you out, doesn't go out of his way to spend time with you then vanishes without making the "effort" to walk around the small Manhattan apartment to find me and say goodbye...screams I could care less!!  Ouch.  Better to know now before I wasted any time.  I've been trying to figure out why he invited me there only to pull what he did...its not like it was a sausage fest, there was plenty of girls there who were all really fun and what gives?

I'll confess, and don't take this as weakness, but a part of me wants to hear from him again. I honestly don't know why exactly since I'm so turned off and offended I don't want to go out with him again...perhaps its a psychological thing being I was the last to text and he didn't respond to me...its a text message power struggle.  I've already deleted his number so if any contact was happening at this point it would be from him anyway.

So all in all...I got a big fuck you from one guy and kind of hooked another.  Whats that whole bit about closing a door and opening a window....yeah, lets go with that.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Give Me Everything...

Once in forever life throws something at you that makes you stop and think “holy fuck is the universe actually listening?”.  This week was kind of like that for me.  For a while now I have been bitching and complaining about men and sex or a lack of in each category.  I cursed the dating process for being so aggravating and somewhat unsatisfying.  I cursed all the good men for already being tied down.  I bit my tongue with slight feelings of jealousy every time I’d see someone else change their relationship to “engaged” along with an accompanying photo of a gorgeous ring on facebook.  And I cursed Dipshit for being the last person I slept with (and it not even being all that great or memorable) and wondered how people managed to find someone to get busy with outside of a relationship.  I’ve seen it happen, friends tell me about it, but how do they do it?!?!  Fucking baffling!  All I want is for all this to change…for some sign of how to make it all happen…for some divine intervention that will at least get the ball rolling!!

Then last weekend happened.  Not the one that just past but the one before…you read all about it…the epic nature of it…where the mystery of sex with strangers was solved as multiple guys tried to get me to go home with them (not that this is something I actually want, I get too attached and emotional to have casual sex, but I’m still curious), where a guy actually impressed me when trying to show he liked me…where I found that when you literally least expect it opportunities come around that just tickle you happy and leave you with the inability to resist.

As you read in my last post (and if you haven’t read, shame on you!  Go do it now and return back…Read Me) I had met this awesome Marine who, while from the area, is currently living on base in Cali & is preparing to leave for Afghanistan any day now.  There is also this other guy, Hot Work Boy, who I’ve known for a few years and have massive amounts of sexual tension with. 

So for Friday night HWB wanted to meet up with me in Hoboken and hang out.  Although from a lot of the recent messages I was receiving from him and the chats we’ve had I think his mind was on more than the usual hang out, make out and dance routine we normally have.  Bout time if you ask me.  I don’t know that I would have gone through with more but regardless I was really looking forward to seeing making out with him since it’s been a while.

After texting with the Marine all day Friday I ended up with two great offers and had to make a choice.  After a lot of debate and nervousness and completely cracking myself up over the situation (no joke, I couldn’t stop giggling because the thought of it all just completely tickled me)…I took a deep breath and made a decision.

I teach Zumba to little kids on Fridays at the Boys & Girls Club in Hoboken.  Its such an amazing hour since they are all so enthusiastic every time I show up.  Naturally after getting all sweaty with the kiddos all I wanted was a shower and a few drinks.  So, I took care of the first and went to meet up with Gryph to take care of the second.  As per usual he never disappoints and had a beer in my hand nearly the second I walked into the bar (McSwiggins if your wondering…its Gryph’s  fav spot).  Then came a few shots, more beer and me trying to calm my nerves for the evening.

He finally he arrived.  I was sitting next to the window chatting with some friends and in he walked.  Once he found me he walked right up and planted a big kiss on my lips (sounds soo junior high lol)  and I got to introduce him to my friends.  Friends…this is the Marine….Marine, friends!!!!

So yes, I picked the Marine.  It had nothing to do with his “patriotic duty” comment which so you all know was a complete joke…and besides he’s a Marine so I fully expect this kind of shit to come out of his mouth.  And nothing to do with him shipping off to fight a war.  And everything to do with me just doing something completely exhilarating.  Completely different then what I’ve been doing.  Something that can for once allow me to fully embrace my youth, my freedom and say fuck it I’m doing exactly what I want!

I tend to think things through way too much.  I consider the future, my feelings, my opinions, my friends opinions, anyone who I may meet in the futures opinions…ok that’s a lie and kind of extreme…but really, I over think a lot of things.  For once, I just wanted to live without thinking and just be fucking daring! 

Pitbull sums it up pretty damn well in my new theme song "Give Me Everything"

Give me everything tonight 
For all we know we might not get tomorrow 
Let's do it tonight 

Back to the evening…we all hung around at Swiggs for a bit and I was really enjoying the Marine’s company.  Conversation was so easy and he was funny, snarky and really sweet.  Gryph kept mentioning how into me he thought the Marine was and how he thought I really liked him too….I will neither confirm nor deny that.

Eventually we left to go next door to The Shannon…except that Gryph ditched me.  He promised he would return but I was weary.  So the Marine and I were left to fend for ourselves.  We got beers and started dancing.  I always appreciate it when a guy isn’t afraid to shake it a bit on the dance floor.  Then we both took a bathroom break  and when we met back up something happened.  I started to freak the fuck out.  When I walked over to him he immediately grabbed me, wrapped his arms around me and gave me a kiss.  Your melting right?  Totally sweet.  The Marine was nothing but sweet and affectionate!!  It was amazing.  Just what I keep saying I want.  Yet here I am with this great looking guy who is smart, successful, protects our country and here I am frantically looking around the bar at all the other guys I was thinking I could flirt with and the opportunities I am possibly missing out on and how if he kissed my head one more time I may bolt.

I kept frantically texting with Gryph begging him to come back and help me.   I was totally losing it.  It was bad.  But ever the amazing friend he is, Gryph managed to calm me down and convinced me to stay.  The fact is, after further discussion the following day I think what happened was that it was a lot in a little amount of time.  We knew each other a week and I knew it was more or less finite since he would be leaving and usually affection like that between two people builds as you get to know them while your dating.  There wasn’t much of a getting to know period and the closeness, which I’ve been craving, completely caught me off guard.  What worries me though is that if this is an indication of how I’ll react anytime a guy shows me affection I’m fucked.  I’ve never been like this before and this is my first real taste of a guy being really into me since Dipshit (and even he wasn’t all that into me when we ended).  It also didn’t help that I kept thinking about our room back at the W (the boy certainly has good taste) and how this would be the first time in…umm forever?, that I’d be doing more than innocently hooking up with a guy.  YIKES!!! 

When we left the bar the Marine wanted some pizza.  So we stopped and grabbed him a slice.  Then he started mentioning if I still wanted to see my other friends who were at Whiskey Bar we could go.  Other friends = HWB and his friends.  The Marine did not know this.  I was kinda drunk so said sure!  Then immediately regretted it.  What in the shit was I doing?? 

Well needless to say they were both extremely jealous of the other to the point it was comical.  Every chance they were able to get in my ear for a second either would say “you want to bang that guy” or “is that your boy?” or something to that effect.  I suppose drunk PYT cannot control her flirtations.  And to add to the already complicated mess of boys, the bartender I told you about, the one who is hot and remembered me…he was there along with a huge smile when he caught my eye.  Geez.  The Marine actually told me on our way out that he was really jealous of HWB and he never gets jealous.  The he’s not that kind of guy and why do I have to be so cool that he actually likes me.  Thanks??

We made our way back to the W and once upstairs I decided I’d get comfortable by slipping into one of the amazing robes they have in the room.  It didn’t take long for the Marine to take control of the situation …that night & in the morning…we got back to the room at around 2:30am…fell asleep eventually….and woke up around 6am to get ready to go to the airport. 

In the time we had together we got to know a lot about one another.  We really had some great conversations.  One of my favorite things he said which completely cracked me up was when he was telling me how he really wants to have someone he can come home to after work and especially someone who can cook since he really can’t, although he does “guy things like make breakfast and BBQ”.  What is it with men and making breakfast anyway?  My Dad is like that too…awesome at breakfast and the grill and not too hot with anything else.  He also insists that his wife takes his name and if she chooses to ignore that tradition of marriage he’s choosing to ignore the engagement ring tradition and plans to blow the money for a ring in Vegas with his friends.  Hilarious.  Also, he has a complex about women driving.  He was insisting to drive my car to the airport.  But the thing is I never let anyone drive my car so that was one battle he wasn’t winning.  He did warn me that if we were dating that would never fly and he’d be driving.  I’m all for guys being men and taking charge of such things, just not behind the wheel of my car.  And lastly the painted me a picture of how, if we were dating and we were in London where we would live and what we would see and do (he lived there for a little over a year for work and seems to really want to go back).  It was adorable.

So, in the end I made a fabulous decision.  We had a blast, he is a great guy and we’ve been keeping in touch since he left.  I have no expectations of dating him or this turning into anything more then what it is on the surface but it was just the boost of excitement I needed.  I’m so happy we caught eyes and he came into my life, even for how brief a moment.  Taking him to the airport was kind of bittersweet.  Its emotional to bring a Marine to the airport knowing there is always a chance he may never come home.  I have a few very good friends who were Marines so I’ve had a taste of this before and it never gets easier…even if its someone you barely know.  We had some wonderful kisses and he even caught me off guard by reenacting the most famous war kiss.  I wonder how long he’s been wanting to do that. 

As I was pulling into my driveway I got a call from him…turns out he seriously fucked up and his flight wasn’t actually until Sunday!!!!  What?!?!?!  He said he considered calling and seeing if I would turn around so we can head back to the hotel and spend the afternoon laying around and spending time together while he ordered us breakfast.  Despite the insanely busy day I had ahead of me, I kinda wish he had.  But he got the airline to switch his ticket and get him on the flight anyway, so he was boarding the plane when he called.  I do miss the excitement of him being around and I do hope we continue to keep in touch.  I hope he stays safe over there…and to all my Marines  “OORAH!!!”

Friday, May 6, 2011

HELP!!! The Marine vs Hot Work Boy...Tonight!!!

Ok everyone, this is not going to be well written, may not even make sense but I’m trying to type as fast as my mind is racing and my heart is beating.  I’m totally freaking the fuck out and I need your opinion!!

So, the end of my epic weekend involved the Arts and Music Festival in Hoboken along with run-ins with Dipshit and a few of his friends one who almost literally knocked me over (and by run-ins I mean I saw them, don’t know if they saw me but no conversation was had, no one ran in the other direction, no eye contact made…so yeah probably the best way that could have happened)…there was delish festival food which always turns me into a piglet and then drinks.

Obviously there would be drinks.  KK, new friend Miss and I went over to McSwiggin’s after a failed attempt on the rooftop of the Dubliner (that place has turned into a huge disappointment, including my date with the Rival, who btw has resurfaced with a couple of random txts, weirdo).  After scoping out the men I went and hunted down a table.  I was successful and also managed to catch the eye of not one but two hotties (one who happens to be a Marine)…who were clearly friends since they were chatting and sitting at the same table (duh).  I later learned one had texted the other saying he thought he was getting "looks" from me hahahah...boys!!

Well cutting out all the in between bullshit  after about 3 beer towers, numerous irresponsible drinking games and lots of laughs we made our way inside and the Marine and I started getting close.  Before I knew it we were making out at the bar, chatting away and having a blast.  Eventually he blurts out that he’s normally not so forward but he really wants to spend the night with me.  What is with guys these days???  I’m not complaining…just totally surprised.  He was saying its my “patriotic duty” to sleep with him since he is a Marine and is going off to Afghanistan in less than a month…and yes, despite killing bin laden he is still going.  Funny.  He was trying to convince me to stay in Hoboken for the night but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

He walked me to my car when I left and asked about my plans for the rest of the week and promised to see me again.  Apparently when he went back to the bar after walking me out he went up to KK who was still there and told her “I really like your friend”…how sweet.  Well everyone…this is what its all supposed to look like…we chatted through Monday and he made plans to take me to dinner on Tuesday.  So this is what a guy who is interested in a girl is supposed to do…what all the books, “experts”, etc tell you about.  So, I kind of cancelled the dinner idea but offered ices instead.  He came to pick me up, rang the bell and opened the door for me…we shared ices and then went for a few drinks.  I know he was undressing me with his eyes the whole time and I have to tell you, I didn’t even care.  It was sexy and I was enjoying his company more then I can say.

He asked to see me again Wednesday night but he had dinner plans with friends in the city pretty late and there was no way I’d be up for going out to the city at that time.  We tried to hang out last night but we were in different places and it was tough.  Now comes tonight.  He told me he really wants to see me before he leaves and is looking into changing his flight tomorrow (yes, he leaves tomorrow) so we can spend a little more time together.

I had plans with friends in Hoboken tonight so he said he’d get a room in the W (yes that implies what you think) and asked if I could take him to the airport the next day.  I have NEVER taking a guy to the airport and I always imagined thats reserved for girlfriends and family.  Just imagining bidding goodbye to a Marine after spending what I'm sure will be quite a passionate evening with him and sending him off to war just tickles me in all sorts of seems ridiculous and like, ummm is this my life?  Who is scripting this???  This doesn't happen in real life, I'm sorry.  Wow, just breathe.  Its all completely fascinating and seems unreal.  Like this should be in some cheesy book or Nicholas Sparks movie. Now don't get me wrong I'm not thinking this is necessarily romantic or that this guy will sweep me off my feet...there is just something really exciting about it.  Not sure why...

Here is my dilemma.  Pre-Marine, there is a guy I’ve known for a long time…Hot Work Boy…he and I have this unresolved romance.  From the second we met at work there was sexual tension and so much attraction.  Basically our MO is to hang out and make out.  I don’t think there has been a time we’ve hung out that our lips haven’t locked.  We’ve never done more, I think I’ve only seen him with his shirt off in pictures but we’ve both talked about wanting to.  Recently he’s been texting me asking why we’ve never dated, why we’re both so hot and still single and expressing how much he wants to “smush” me…there we go again with the sex and the jersey shore…sensing a pattern???  

Anyway, he lives in LI and spends a bunch of time in Hoboken and we haven’t seen each other in quite a while.  So earlier this week he asked to see me tonight and made plans for a night out in the boken.  FUCK!!!  So, now I have Hot Work Boy and the Marine both wanting to see me tonight and I’m completely torn about what to do.  I’ll be honest, I wish I could hang out with both, go back to the W with the Marine and have some posh overnight love affair, never having Hot Work Boy find out about it and pick up normal life once the Marine ships off.  Reality says that will never happen.  One good thing and plus with Hot Work Boy is that he's not going anywhere...he'll be here and I know I'll see him again.  This doesn't make my decision any easier.

The Marine texted me earlier telling me that he really likes me and thinks I’m a really great girl and that he’s not trying to hang out with me just for sex.  That he really enjoys talking to me and thinks I’m a lot of fun.  While that is sweet a part of me can’t help but want to scream bullshit…this reads I want sex before I go to war all over it.  I mean he was even joking about how he needs to have “good bye good luck” sex.  All in good fun I suppose but its still my life we’re messing with.  So while I do believe he likes me I can’t imagine that I’d hear from him again or see him again for that matter…but he could prove me wrong, he seems to have that potential.

So, what do you all think?  What should I do?!?!  Help!!!!

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Are You DTF...

Every once in a while a weekend rolls around that catches you by surprise because it is just completely EPIC.  Its like a little added bonus, kind of like those little “extra” test tube shots they stick into a frozen drink at restaurants, when it all just happens and it was completely unplanned.  This was my weekend.

Friday night I decided I was going to meet up with A Bomb in Hoboken…not too shocking.  After a last minute screw you from my stomach which had me doubled over in pain for about a half hour for God knows what reason and thinking I wasn’t going to make it out, I was finally able to pull it the fuck together and make my way to Jersey.  Naturally the lack of traffic wasn’t a gift but a curse as every single path which would lead to the Holland Tunnel…aka the most direct and quick routes into Hoboken…were closed due to some shooting in the tunnel.  Lovely.

When I finally got there and parked, I was kind of tired and swore it would be an early night.  Kiss. Of. Death.  I ended up getting home around 4am…oops.  The night didn’t end without some um, interesting events taking place.  First, when we got to one of my favorite spots, Whiskey Bar, I run into friends of mine who I had no idea were going to be there.  This became a way bigger deal then it needed to be but you know how it is with alcohol and excitement…overreaction!!! 

As we made our way to the back to watch the band we’re ordering drinks and a new friend K tells me the uber hot bartender is single.  So we make our way over to generate an intro for me.  Turns out, he remembers meeting me before…weird.  I know we’ve chatted in the past but he’s a bartender and that was forever and a day ago, can’t believe he remembered me.  Guess I made an impression.

We chatted a little throughout the night but he was working and I was having too much fun on the dance floor to try and stick by the bar all night just to chat with him.  He gave me a huge hug and kiss on the cheek when I told him I was leaving and asked that I please come back soon.  Yawn.  Ask for my number and to see me outside the bar.  Thanks.

When we walked towards the front A Bomb was doing what she does best and was ordering jager bombs for us.  I swear, you cannot be around her without having at least one jager bomb.  Its almost never one though.  Next thing I know some cute guy starts talking to me, buys me a shot of patron and is doing a great job flirting.  He’s inviting my friends and I to come hang out with him and his buddy who was off dancing all by himself.  Well as a joke I went over to dance with him and let me tell you, it was no joke, this kid could move!  When I got a minute to breath I walked back over to the original boy and made mention that his friend seemed to be trying to move in.  he was too sweet to really say anything.

Moving on to all of us getting kicked out so the bar could close…we are outside and this tiny dancer was chatting it up with me.  Then I started to realize he was a bit of a dick. 

Boy: “I’ve got to be honest, you are so fucking hot and sexy…I really want to have sex with you.”

Me: “I see we’re doing straight to the point…smooth.”

Boy: “well c’mon on you DTF or not?”

Me: thrusting my hand on his chest “what the fuck did you just say? Are you making $100,000 for this episode, where are the cameras?  I didn’t realize I was getting filmed for the Jersey Shore!”

Boy: “No, its not like that.  c’mon babe I just really want to have sex with you, are you DTF or not?”

Me: “Actually its exactly like that babe…and do people actually talk like that in real life??  What are you trying to be The Situation?  Because your failing, miserably…babe”

This went on for a few more minutes before the ridiculousness wore off and I started walking to my car.  But to my surprise he pressed on.  You would think even the biggest player would have his ego so bruised and have already set his sights on another girl who may be DTF…but no, he wanted me.  Fuck.

So I get to my car and he’s trying to convince me to make out with him.  Again, wasn’t working.  In between his, at this point desperate, attempts to get me to go home with him he started asking me if we could just hook up in the back seat of my car.  Are you out of your goddamn mind you little slimy turd???  I would not let you in my car if you paid me!  Let alone touch me. 

To try and get rid of him I told him he should call me tomorrow since I’d be in Hoboken and we can meet up then.  

Boy: “Listen I’m not going to be your boyfriend” 

Me: “You’re kidding right?  Despite your obvious fear of commitment the fact that you think I’d want you to be my boyfriend is comical.  If I wanted to date some wanna be Jersey Shore Guido I could have stayed home tonight”  

Boy: “No its not like that.  just girls seem to think that I’m going to be their boyfriend because we sleep together and I’m not like that”

Me: “Well last I checked we didn’t sleep together and I’m not like that.  Listen I don’t know what girls fucked you up so badly but you seriously need to get over yourself.  And I seriously need to get home”

And suddenly there was a change.  He suddenly got quiet, less defensive and looked at me with the saddest eyes.  Clearly I struck a nerve and hit the nail right on the head.

Boy: “youre right, I’m sorry.  Whats your number, I’ll send you mine.  I’m not going to text you though asking where you are and hunting you down. I don’t text girls, you can text me”

Me:  trying to control my laughter “well if that wasn’t the most backhanded attempt at being a man.  Seriously, I’m going home.  Good night.”

And that was that.  What a fucking head case. 

Tomorrow you get to hear about a festival, a near miss & a Marine.  Stay Tuned!!