Welcome Guest!!!

My motivation recently for anything other then Zumba has been fairly limited.  Trying to get my routines down, go on auditions and get my classes started has been nothing short of exhausting.  My entire body hurts right now...I have shin splints and sore muscles.  I am in great shape but doing hours and hours a night of Zumba is not normal and now I suffer.


On top of that I pretty much partied myself sick.  No not hangover sick but like sinus infection sick.  No sleep with lots of drinking, dancing and not eating much will actually run you down...where is my college tolerance...what the fuck.


Anyway, I owe you all some amazing stories from Mexico as well as my recent adventures during a Bachelorette party (which involves a Bachelor from London) and a 30th Birthday for Gryph in the Poconos.  


In the meantime, I leave you with a guest post which is delayed since our fabulous poster had a brain fart and forgot to send it to me when he was supposed to.  Because I love him and his blog (I've never met him so its a blog crush obvi) I forgive him & want to share the post with you anyway.


The blogger is Jeremy from Dear ExGirlfriend.  The format for his blog is super creative and seriously entertaining since he basically writes letters to girls he dates recounting the date, how he felt, how he think she felt and so on.  Its great insight into a guys mind post date and you get a really great feel of what a funny, sincere and sweet man he is...as well as how he is genuinely just as clueless about dating as the rest of us.  Its truly refreshing because I feel too many people try and act like experts and gives all these rules, guidelines, tips and tricks for dating but the fact is none of us know what the fuck we're doing.  We go out there and bullshit our way through until we have that ah-ha moment when we say "oh ok, this is cool...this is working" with someone. And then you get to navigate a relationship...woo!


Anyway, thank you to Jeremy for being so real...I heart it and appreciate & I know you all will too!  So, enjoy his post and make sure you hop on over and check out his blog after!!



"some people play hard to get. i play hard to want."



Dear Katie,
We went on a few dates this fall, and immediately two things were extremely clear to me: 1. you are a tease and 2. you like to play ‘the game.’  I’ll forgive you for item #1, after all 98% of females I know are teases on some level.  In fact, most of you don’t even know you are doing it consciously so it’s not as if I can actually blame you.  Although next time you are on a THIRD date with someone who buys you an expensive dinner and takes you to a romantic comedy he didn’t want to see (starring Justin effing Long), AND you bring up how much you enjoy a good make out session…don’t act all shocked and awed when he tries to kiss you goodnight.  Ok, now that I’ve got that out of the way, let’s move on to the game…


It’s actually hard for me to describe the game, because not only do I not play it, I don’t even really know how to play it if I wanted to.  Why is that, you might ask?  I don’t even know what the effing game is.  What I do know is that I apparently suck at it.  How do I know this? You told me so.


Before I forget I must thank you for being extremely informative, even if you were kind of a bitch about it.

I promise I wasn't 

even going to open my mouth...

Photo Courtesy of OKmagazine.com

After the first couple times we went out, I realized that I was definitely into you, and unfortunately I made that too clear.  I did not text/email/call/facebook chat/gchat you 17 times a day, or anything remotely along those lines.  Instead, after it had been a week or so since we hung out I said, “You know I had a really good time hanging out with you last week, I’d like to take you on more of a date date this weekend…dinner and a movie, or something like that.”  So, we went to dinner and a movie…where the story from the first paragraph about me buying you dinner, you talking about how much you like making out, etc etc, may or may not have happened.


That was the last time we hung out.  It had nothing to do with me being overly-aggressive (in your terms) by trying to kiss you goodnight.  Forwhat it’s worth, I’ll tell you my mindset again – we had been out three times, it was a brightly lit parking lot with other people leaving the movie, all I wanted was to give you a quick kiss on the lips; I wasn’t going to ram my tongue down your throat.  But that wasn’t it, apparently I played my cards too early, you told me.  I made it obvious that I enjoyed your company, simply by telling you that I, in fact, enjoyed your company.  There was no chase in it for you.  I should’ve played hard to get, or something like that.


Anyway, as much as I enjoyed our few dates, I’m glad you told me that; because no offense, I would never want to spend too much time with someone who has that mindset.  I don’t think you are a bad person or anything, like I said before, ‘the game’ just isn’t for me.  I tell people how I feel, not in an overly melodramatic way, but the same rule applies: if I like you, I like you.  I’m going to want to hang out because I enjoy hanging out with you; I’m not going to sit on my hands and pretend I don’t so you somehow like me more.
Of course, if I don’t get laid anytime soon I might have to change my ways.  Kidding, I promise.


Hope you win your next ‘game,’


Player ( get it – like, ‘don’t hate the player hate the game…)


*The Adventures of Ford Fairlane – yup, I quoted an Andrew Dice Clay movie.

"Love Begins With L"

Don't get fooled by the title...I'm not in love!  I'm not even in like...with someone I've actually met yet anyway...but thats a story for another post.


Anyway, I was supposed to get this up yesterday and in an epic fail I didn't.  The day completely got away from me and before I knew it Patches and I were the last two people in the gym at 11pm and nearly got locked in...can you even imagine?!?!?!


So onto the post...I was contacted by this company L. (a condom company) about sharing a campaign they released on their site yesterday.  After reading through their site and the campaign I thought what they are trying to do is interesting, intriguing and something which affects the entire world.  The company addresses one of the worlds most troubling issues HIV and AIDS while trying to empower women, educate on family planning and potentially help decrease poverty.  Pretty awesome.  


I know this is not what you would expect me to be writing about but as a dating blog two aspects of dating are love and sex and the scary truth is that all it takes is one time with one person combined with you not being careful for your entire life to change.  


Also, I think the women on this site seem to completely have their stuff together and this is completely in spite of a man...that is also an extremely relevant example for girls who are dating.  Relationships are wonderful and beautiful and love is a precious gift, however, you don't   need a man to be successful, to be happy or to make waves in the world.


Before I go on a rant let me stick to the topic on hand...


Here is their statement about what L. is:


"L. is a new social enterprise that makes doing good sexy. It's a condom company with a cause: to empower women globally by supporting the human right to safe sex. For every condom you purchase, one is distributed in a developing country. You can learn more about the company here: Love Begins with L "


With their buy one, give one philosophy (I just totally made that up...thats good stuff right their, marketing genius if you ask me, hey L. you should hire me!) L. says on its site that if they were to "represent 5% of the condom market we can serve the needs of three countries with the highest prevalence rate."  That is a beautiful thing but one must remember you can give a person a lifetime supply of condoms but that doesn't mean they are going to use it.  There are guys I know who refuse to wear condoms even being extremely well educated on all the risks.  

To L. :  as you know, the education aspect of what you are doing is more important than any woman you may interview, any number of condoms you may give out or how green your product is (although I am personally appreciative and impressed by your environmental sustainability efforts!).  Even more important than that, in my opinion, is motivation.  You can educate and supply people but these tools are worthless unless people want to use them.  What would be enough to make an individual want to be protected...if it's not the threat of HIV/AIDS or an unwanted pregnancy or the threat of poverty...would it be something else?  Maybe the flip side...perhaps the motivation would be found in the promise of a future, a job or a multitude of other things.  Everyone is motivated by something...just got to figure out what that is in this case.

Sorry, I got a little off track for a second...now onto L.'s campaign...finally...

For every day of March, women's month, L. met a women representative of the kind of love that rocks the world hard enough to change it. On the 31st, they introduced the 31 women who inspired them on their site. Each women supports the movement to make safe sex a human right. As you click on each woman's photo you are brought to her page where you can read a little blurb about her (some of these women lead seriously impressive lives) along with her answer to 3 questions around the power of love to change the world.

You can get inspired at: L31



I hope you take some time to look at a few of these women and check out their site.  Disclaimer:  Just so you know I am not getting paid for this and I don't know a soul who works for this company.  I got contacted by them, checked them out and decided it was worth sharing.  I hope you agree!!

Guest Post - "Rock out with your C*** out"

Today I bring you the second ever guest post on DATERVIEW!!!  Another post which should have gone up last week but my Mexican Resort had shit internet (everything else was gorgeous and perfect...go figure) so unfortunately the guest posts were delayed.  But better late then never...


...and today's post was 100% worth the wait.  


Meet little miss Alice X from The Boyfriend Drama.  If you haven't read her blog before you should...like now...well, not right this minute because you should read her incredible guest post first.  This story is one for the books and something I think every girl who has ever hit the dancefloor of a bar, club, party, etc experienced at least once.  Only this is 1000x more amazing because well she has photographic evidence.


Thanks so much for the post Alice, I hope to have you stop by again soon!!!


And now, without further delay....




"Rock out with your C*** out"

Photo credit: pablogv2004 from morguefile.com

This is my first guest post so I should introduce myself, I go by the name of Alice X, I blog about all things men and I don't take myself too seriously, that's pretty much it really.

When PYT contacted me to do a guest post on a vacation hook-up/dating/break-up experience I jumped at the chance, so sit back, relax and let me take you back to my younger self...

Forget Ibiza, Spain, and all other exotic holiday destinations, instead think rain, think sheep, think Wales, United Kingdom.

I'm 18 which means I can now legally buy an alcoholic beverage, get absolutely wasted and tell everyone how much I love them ("no really *hiccups* I love you so much, you're like my bestest fri*hic*end ever") without any shame what so ever. This is awesome! The vodka shots are stacked and me plus five of my best friends are aiming straight for the dance floor; and we're doing some weird half dance, half walk to get there. We are the coolest people I know.

By now the drink has saturated my liver and my vodka confidence is at its peak, I break away from the pack. A dangerous move, but I'm 18, I'm semi mature and that guy is busting some serious moves over there. This is my chance, my chance... to dance! At this point I firmly believe I am the best dancer in the Universe and if I can just dance with that guy, we could be like Channing Tatum and Whatsherface? from Step Up. Go me! (Idiot).

I have now successfully shimmied my way to the dancing guy and we are having some kind of mini dance off. He does a move; I copy him with an extra slice of drunken fool coolness thrown in for good measure. Things are heating up, he's excited by my super dance skills and he moves closer. I smile as my friend snaps a quick photo of me dancing like a trooper. He starts almost grinding on me. I'm beginning to regret my extra dance efforts. I turn away from him, but still he's dancing practically on top of me. I can feel something digging in my back, wait a minute... this guy has a stiff wicket and it's pointed right in my direction. Not cool dance guy, not cool!

I break free and run back to the safety of the pack and tell them all about his special dance weapon. How could they not believe me? I turn to point it out, but wait... where did he go?

***

Arriving back home after our great British holiday, our first port of call is Max Spielmann. Photos developed and ready, we sift through laughing at the memories of the past week, then... "OMG" there it is in full colour. Photographic evidence!

Welcome Home & Guests

I'm sad to say that I have returned home from my amazing Mexican adventure...thank you NYC for still being cold as shit.


I'm trying to get myself back to reality aka staring at my still fully packed suitcase while I try and bust out a short entry to you guys and get my Zumba routines down (I just became an instructor everyone!!!!).  I just can't believe its over...so sad!  Although one more night in Mexico may have killed me...god bless all inclusive. 


Anyway, for some reason I had major issues trying to post all the guest posts while I was away...the computers were terrible and the price of the internet was not worth the aggravation I was facing.  So, I will be posting them now and you will enjoy each one because lets be honest, they kick ass!!


So, I'm going to get back to shaking my ass to some latin beats and leave you with todays guest post from the ever fabulous Jewels over at Turning 30: A Journey of Self Exploration  She has an amazing blog filled with stories which will make you laugh, make you think, reflect and maybe even shed a tear.  She's a wonderful writer and this is an awesome vacay story...I'm so happy to have her be my FIRST guest post!!!!


Oh and because I was away I wasn't able to tell you all the I also WROTE my FIRST guest post for my girl Hutch over at Be Awesome Instead....once you are done with Jewels post hop on over and check it out here: The Legend (BUT only do that when you read this first!...got it? Good!)


And now here it is...


Firstly thank you so much for inviting me to come over and post while you are on vacation! I cannot wait to hear all about it when you get home…I hope there is lots of romance and even more laughter. Enjoy it!!

The summer after my senior year of high school when everyone was heading to Mexico or Florida for senior week I was sitting at home, all kinds of not going. I more than made up for it though when I went to Greece with 2 of my 3 younger sisters, my grandmother, and my best friend from Florida, Sofia. We spent a month traveling Greece, staying with family in Thessaloniki, taking in the sights, and flirting with European men. Luckily for me Sofia speaks fluent Greek and we were able to head off on our own quite a bit…even taking motorcycle rides around Athens with random, skinny jean wearing, Greek men.

The highlight of the trip was the cruise to the Greek Islands. I mean come on—the Greek Islands-amazingly beautiful-you’d have to be crazy not to love a trip like that. It wasn’t just the sights though, it was summer and there were a lot of other kids my age on the ship. We had a blast at the dance clubs, drinking with our awesome bartender Sheriff and dancing our butts off. I had a hopeless crush on Jamie, a pot smoking, Bob Marley loving, super sweet kid but we were both too shy to do anything but smile at one another.

Things changed on the 3rd night when I saw somebody across the room and realized he was staring, unabashedly, at me with a sly smile on his face. I quickly looked away, blushing at being given attention by an incredibly attractive member of the boats staff. I know you are probably groaning and saying, “NO, Jewels! The wait staffs are notorious for womanizing…please tell us you didn’t hook up with him.” Let me reiterate that I was a naïve 17 year old virgin who swooned at the slightest bit of male attention back then, having no knowledge of a woman’s power.

So, Ace, yes his name was Ace, was a strikingly handsome 6’3”, broad shouldered, light skinned Pilipino, with a smile so dazzlingly white I lost my breath. This man looked like he spent all his free time in the ship’s gym, and by the way he made the tattoo of 4 aces on his bicep dance, I wouldn’t doubt that he did. I digress.

I had seen him around the ship, but ship staff are not allowed to hang out with passengers so talking to him was difficult. He resorted to something pretty forward and sent a note with my room straigtener/towel animal maker/pajama folder that said, “I’d really like to meet the lovely girl with the beautiful brown eyes. Sun deck 9:30 pm. Ace” How does a 17 year old resist the implied romance of a forbidden cruise ship rendezvous

Needless to say at 9:30 that night I was up on the desk, standing at the railing, looking out at the water (useless since it’s just black) and hoping he would show up. Ace came up behind me and placed his arms around me, placing his chin on my head, and looking out with me. I leaned back into him, and we just stood there, didn’t say a thing, for a good couple of minutes. (Can I get an: awwww!?)

I spent the night curled up with him on a lounge chair up on the deck talking and kissing. Turns out Ace was a pretty nice guy, working on the ship to see the world and send money back to his family. I thought this was incredibly mature and responsible of him at 22 and had an incredible crush on him by the end of the night. I crept into my room at 5am to change for our excursion that day-being tired was more than worth it.

The next night was too cold to spend outside all night and since he wasn’t supposed to be seen with me he decided to give me a behind the scenes tour of the boat. We went below deck into the staff part of the boat. I don’t remember a whole lot about that tour but I do remember going out on a small shielded balcony and watching the water off the back of the boat, pretty dang low towards the ocean and letting him hold me. He showed me his room but we didn’t stay since his roommate was there. We just walked around, holding hands and kissing.

It was a very sweet little vacation romance. There was restrained passion, the thrill of the forbidden, late nights, and lips plump from kissing all night. We talked, we got to know one another, and we enjoyed each other. I will always remember him with a smile on my face and a bit of a flutter in my tummy. Sofia jokingly signed all her cards to me, for years afterwards, “Ace loves you…but the rest of the boat staff loved me.” I wouldn’t call it love, but for those 9 days we were certainly in like. 

Express Yourself...

Back in November I went off to Ireland and left my blog in the dust while I was off drinking, sightseeing and flirting with hot Irish men!  I would apologize...but I'm not sorry.  I do feel somewhat guilty though.


So, next week while Patches & I are down in beautiful Mexico I'd love to provide you with some entertainment...well I guess really I'd love for you to provide yourselves with some entertainment.  


In other words, my lazy I'm already in vacay mode ass, wants some guest posts I can put up during the week while I'm away.  (Actually, I may end up forcing my sister to do it but really who is keeping track anyway?)


I know you have all been dreaming of the opportunity to post here on Daterview so now is your big chance.  I was thinking it would be fun and appropriate if you write in with your best/funniest/sexiest/horrific vacation hook-up/dating/break-up/etc stories!


Send me an email and let me know you want to post...or throw a comment on this post and we'll set it up!!  I can't wait to see what you've got....and hopefully I'll have stories just as good or if not better when I return.  (Don't worry, I'll still be posting till I leave on sunday)

Inspiration

Hug a Random Stranger

Saturday night was girls night.  You know the kind that starts with you all going to get manicures then hitting up the liquor store for two bottles of wine to bring to the BYOB restaurant for your table of 3…

Armed with our bottles in hand MJ, A-Bomb and I head across the street to Charritos…an absolutely delish Mexican restaurant in Hoboken.  The little closet size downtown location is completely packed, despite it still being early, so we leave our name to endure the 40min wait.  Luckily, they have this fantastic system where you give them your cell number so you can go on living your life while you wait for your table to be ready instead of sitting around trying to pass the time while you are tortured by the smell of delicious food. Charritos, my tummy thanks you.

We took this as our cue to hop over to Whiskey Bar (yes, we do love this place) and grab a couple of beers while we wait.  I grab a high top towards the back while MJ grabs some beers.  As we all settle down and get to talking the blog comes up which then leads to conversation about dating.  (this is what I mentioned in my post on Monday)  I will most definitely be posting about all those topics and maybe a few more because this chat was awesome…just the flow of it, the perspectives we all had and the questions the girls were asking.  I was thoroughly enjoying it.  


Then to snap us back to reality this guy pops up at our table with a huge grin on his face and flashes a Jenga piece at us.  “I have to hug a random stranger” Say what?  I think the girls did a double take just as quick as I did.  He spoke so fast and had so much pep we all just had to laugh.  He was playing drunken Jenga (where you write really stupid shit for people to do on each piece) and the piece he just pulled said he had to hug a random stranger.  So after he marches over to give me a hug (yes, I was the chosen one) he invites us to join them in the game.  We clearly weren’t moving so the fun was brought to us, as it should be.  The game is quickly set up, we make 3 new friends and despite our desire to start gnawing on the jenga pieces to keep our hunger at bay we were slightly disappointed when we got the call our table was ready…so much so that we stayed to finish the game and our beers with a promise to come back for round 2.

Dinner was fantastic, as expected, and we even got to listen in on what we eventually determined to be a 3^rd or 4^th date…you are practically sitting on the lap of the person next to you in this place so you really can’t help but overhear what people are saying…not that I’m above listening in even if we weren’t.  The wine we brought (which I had forgot at the bar and had to run back for…rookie mistake) was for Sangria.  We brought white and red.  Charittos will whip you up delish pitchers of Sangria if you bring wine…aaahhhh-mazing.  We got through the first and they brought out the second but before we even got to pour it they told us we couldn't drink it.  Due to a high volume of people waiting for tables we needed to get going. Sad.  We were told they would gladly take the cost of the pitcher and the bottle of wine we brought off the bill if we didn’t mind taking the Sangria to go.  Umm…free Sangria??? Don’t have to twist my arm.  During dinner I had been texting with Gryph who saw I was in Hoboken from foursquare…he totally stalks my life…and wanted to hang out.  So, to-go Sangria in hand we head over to his place.  But before we left I made a declaration…my mission for the night was for all 3 of us to make-out.  Game on.

Eventually we leave and make our way to the Wicked Wolf.  As fate would have it I run into a bunch of friends who were already there.  Before I could even sip my first beer this hot guy Jay comes (literally) stumbling over to me.  He’s there with my friends but I haven’t met him before.  He’s flirting, I’m flirting but I can’t help but notice how we are on completely different levels of drunk.  It’s hard enough to talk to someone in a bar, add to that the fact that he’s wasted and it becomes quite the challenge.  But as we keep talking I am able to make out that he’s smart, definitely in shape (yes, I felt up his arms), has a good job and according to my friends he wanted to talk to me from the second I walked in (score).  


And now the bad part…he’s 5yrs younger than me.  I almost choked on my beer when he told me.  When I made him try to guess my age he swore that it’s impossible for me to be over 25...impossible except for the fact that I am.  I could tell he was really surprised when I finally let my real age slip but it didn’t turn him off.  He really wanted to hang out with me.  He tried everything…trying to get me to dance, buy me a drink, talk to my girls.  I give him a lot of credit.  And honestly, if he wasn’t so young I would have had a hard time keeping my lips off his.  In hindsight, what is a few years when you’re having fun?  Its not like I had to marry him.

We decide to head back to Whiskey Bar (notice a pattern?) and this is where the fun begins.  I see this hot guy standing against the wall…I must have been staring because I notice his wingman point over in my direction.  And as a good wingman would do he soon makes his way over to break the ice.  Soon enough we are all introduced and Bobby and I are chatting.  I find out we live about 10min from each other which is nice and we get the where did you go to school, what do you do stuff out of the way.  We start dancing and I’m impressed that he actually has some skill…I love a guy who can dance.  I also realize just how tall and big he is…I’m only 5’4” and had heels on yet when I went to put my arms around him to dance (which I could barely do because of his oh-so-muscular arms/shoulders…sigh) I have to completely crane my neck to see his face.  Just my type.  

Then the moment comes…you know the one where you feel his hands go to the small of your back…your eyes are locked and you both feel the pull of your faces towards one another…I love that moment.  The anticipation, the unknown, the excitement.  We kiss.  And he is just the sweetest kisser…you can tell he is a complete gentleman, its kind of adorable.  Then he grabs my hand and askes me if I would mind going outside.  He wanted the opportunity to talk to me and ask me for my number in a more quiet, intimate atmosphere...yes, I know...aawww.  At this point A-bomb had already disappeared outside with a boy (I was assuming at this point 2 out of 3 have made out) and I felt bad to leave MJ but she encouraged me to go.

At the door the bouncer threatened us that if we leave we can’t come back…so we settle off to the side instead.  A few more kisses and my phone number safely stored in his cell we head back towards our friends.  And what do I find?!?  MJ…locked in a serious kiss with some guy.  Was I gone that long?!?!  She wasn't talking to anyone when I left her!  I’m so proud I nearly shrieked and jumped with excitement.  I can tell she’s having a hard time pulling herself away and it’s just fantastic.  But unfortunately we are kicked out of the bar and all is over.

The Juicy Details:  Well, my wish came true.  We all made out…and we all enjoyed it.  Turns out MJ’s boy was just that…he was 23…ironic right???  Such a cougar!!  She raved about what an amazing kisser he was…perhaps age has something to do with it?  Kids these days with their amazing kisses.  A-bomb ditched us while we went to get pizza and headed back to her place to prepare for our arrival.  Bobby and his boys followed us to the pizza place (uninvited) which for some reason bugged me at the time.  This in turn caused me to be a bit of a snot because I felt like it was a bit too much.  I rushed out of there once our pizza was done and gave him such a cold goodbye I'm sure he could see his breath.  Now that I look back on it I feel bad for being a bitch and kind of wish I could take it back.  I won't be surprised if I dont hear from him.  Fail.

The Happiest of Hours

Happy Hump Day all you sexy people ;-)




I write to you this morning with an exciting announcement....the first ever co-hosted NYC Happy Hour with yours truly and the one & only Katie from DATE ME, D.C.   is officially booked....


Here are your details:

If you're interested in checking it out here is the link for the bar:  Vol de Nuit

This is your chance to get to meet both Katie & I  while drinking some delicious beer, making friends and who knows maybe even score a date! I hope we get to see as many of you there as possible...You don't want to miss this!!!