Friday, August 13, 2010

A Boat...A Beer...A Boy

Wow, I haven’t posted in a week…what the fuck is wrong with me?  Well, lets be honest, that’s a stupid question…I’m a lazy bastard.  I’ll admit I do a lot of thinking, a lot of mental noting, a lot of bullshitting to people about my blog but do I ever sit down, discipline myself for at least 5 fucking minutes and pump out a few entries…hell to the no.  Apparently, I’d much rather google decorating ideas or read dating message boards and respond to other peoples issues or go on facebook half a dozen times within the hour…and with every click of the shitty mouse my job gave me I keep thinking why can’t I just write that stupid post I’ve been thinking about for the past 4 days (and yes, I’m doing all of this from the comfort constraints of my desk, somehow people here think I’m super productive)

The newest adventure involves not a date but a first encounter.  Last Friday I was going out for a friends birthday to this awesome bar on a boat in the city.  Once again the getting out of work at 3:30 devil reared its ugly head because I was slated to arrive to the bar before everyone else.  This actually turned out to be a major score in the parking department being that I managed to get a spot on the west side highway right in front of the bar…my aggravation faded for about 15min as I basked in the glory of my achievement.  Then as my car began heating up from the sun beating in and I felt myself begin to cook I started to lose my patience.  I decided the best thing to do would be to get out and go stand by the water, get some fresh air and enjoy the views (both of the water and the gorgeous men walking onto the boat).

I’d like to note at this time that as of recently (aka a couple of weeks ago) I feel like I’ve given up on guys.  Given up in the sense that I just don’t give a shit.  You want to talk to me?  Sure.  You want my number?  Sure.  You want to kiss me?  Sure, only if your hot.  Through all of this however, I have zero expectations…meaning I don’t expect phone calls, texts, dates, facebook friend invites…nada, zilch, nothing.  It takes a lot of stress out of things and helps me to not to get disappointed…I mean when you expect nothing, anything you do get is like a pleasant surprise. 

So I was sitting there praying to god I wouldn’t pee myself (I had to go from the minute I left work and it was now about 5:30 so two hours of the pee-pee dance was a little insane) and trying to distract myself with a little brick breaker on my BB when I suddenly feel someone standing over me.  I look up and this seriously hot guy, Casanova, is standing over me with this great big smile.  He thrusts out his hand to introduce himself and I hear his buddies cheering in the background.

After he’s done making me blush by calling me “so beautiful” about a dozen times, kissing my hand and just all around being perfectly adorable he asked if I’d be going to the Frying Pan as well and said I should find him inside so he could by me a drink.  ::sigh::  If only I believed the words coming out of his beautiful Italian lips.  Either way, I just got a HUGE confidence booster and forgot about how badly I had to pee and how fucking long it was taking my girls to get there. 

Patches finally arrived and while I was sorry for bugging the shit out of her knowing she was stuck in a cab in traffic I was soo excited to get inside to the bathroom and also tell her about Casanova…turns out I did this simultaneously because I couldn’t wait for either one.  A bucket of beer later Patches and I decide to ditch the group and check out the views (the sunset and the cuties).  All was wonderful.  Then on our way to the bar to get ourselves a pitcher of sangria we literally bump into Casanova.  He naturally realizes who I am and to my luck so do his friends “oh my god it’s the girl from the bench!”  We all stand there laughing and chatting as Casanova makes a total spectacle of himself, which I admit I’m totally eating up.  He’s dancing (and there is no music playing anywhere), he’s telling me the sweetest things and complements just every bone in my body and is nearly drooling over my bangs.  His poor friends heard “how cute is she?” so many times I was surprised none of them were vomiting overboard. 

The two events which happened next were surprising, amazing (?), hilarious and a little umm wacky but I was in my “I don’t give a fucking fuck” mode so I was rolling with it.  Casanova grabs my face in his hands and before I know it plants a kiss right on my lips after which I hear his buddy scream “no way! Was there tongue?!”  no, sorry to disappoint no tongue but wow did that just happen?  Before I could say that out loud he was going in for another and in a desperate attempt not to look like some slut that just kisses random guys at a bar I slowly turn my head to the side and give Cas some cheek.  He wasn’t too fond of this and quickly gave me a lecture on his amazing lips.  Oh Cas… 

After a little more of the kissing game he goes back to telling me “Your so beautiful, its all your mothers fault”  and you may think after hearing this for a while it would get old…but honestly, it doesn’t.  Even thinking about it now makes me laugh.  Fact is he could have been completely full of shit but it really didn’t matter because I was getting a kick out of hearing it just as much as he was by saying it.  I had been holding my phone in my hand this whole time because a good friend of mine I haven’t seen in a long time was coming to meet us and I didn’t want to miss his call so I could tell him where we are standing.  Apparently Cas took this as an invitation to grab my phone and actually CALL my MOM!!!  Why?? Well, to tell her how wonderful I am and that its all her fault I’m so beautiful.  I shit you not.  He handed me the phone after he was done because she wanted to talk to me.  Yes, of course she does because now she thinks her daughter has been abducted by some crazy she always warned me about.

Finally its time to part from Casanova and his buddies because my friend got there and frankly, I didn’t want to just hang around like some groupie who doesn’t have anything better to do.  Bye Cas, it was so much fun.

The Juicy Details:  Aside from all the stolen kisses, which there were plenty of, Casanova’s great lips (I will attest to the fact that he was 100% telling the truth about those) he seems like a real quality guy.  Totally my type across the board which shocked me and just seriously loveable.  He has a fantastic personality.  Before he let me get away he insisted I give him my number so he could take me out for a really nice dinner…oh, so sweet.  I give him a few rolls of my eyes because I don’t believe a word of this but I give him my number anyway and as a joke (which he took literally) I told him to save my number in his phone as “The love of my life”.  Well, I can tell you that I was so surprised to get a text from him on Monday saying “Heyy, its Casanova from Frying Pan, just wanted to say hi”  To which I eventually replied “Hi back :)” “How was your weekend?”  A few days later and nothing in return yet.  So 1) I figured that would be the case so no real surprise there and 2) I’m really annoyed because who actually texts just to say Hi?!?!  I never thought people really did that.  You are a weird one Cas.  I will keep you posted as to whether or not he says anything more then hi but lets not count on it.  I would like to thank him for an extremely memorable evening either way!


  1. thank you! it made for a very interesting night ;)

  2. Wait, he called your mom? Like seriously? My mom would be like WTF are you doing and where did you find this guy. Followed by: are you drunk and don't let him take you home.

  3. He *seriously* and legitimately called my mom!!! He grabbed my phone and was like, she must be in here under mom's cell and saw "home" so dialed that. Thank god my mom picked up and not my dad...that would have been a disaster of epic proportions!!!! When I got on the phone I could here the panic in her voice...Ash & I both had to assure her we were ok and everything was under control....more or less ;-)

  4. My face has never been grabbed and forced upon like that, but if it ever did happen, I'd like to think I would beat the living shit out of him haha. I mean, I know I would curse him out and probably hit him, but it'd really feel best if I got one good punch on the nose.

    But hey, if YOU like it, good for you! It sure makes for an interesting read.